Ode to the Semicolon
By Tony Noland
The simple thoughts of children need only simple punctuation,
A sentence with one verb, one noun, for every situation.
“I want a cookie.” “She hit me!” “When are we going to eat?”
These subject/object pairings up express these thoughts complete.
As we mature, our thoughts do too, become harder to express.
Complexity increases, stacked more and more, not less.
“Optic blasts are awesome, but adamantium claws are better.”
“Should I call up Mary Lou, or send an e.mail letter?”
Related concepts bloom within, so quickly they do roll on,
To show they’re separate (but connected), apply the semicolon.
The sentences could stand apart, but linking them together
Allows the thought to seamlessly express itself much better.
“We danced all night; it was divine.” describes one case in point.
The first and second halves of which each other do anoint.
“We danced all night. It was divine.” How choppy and how stilted!
Without the semicolon how the narrative gets wilted!
Conditional or adverse, it supports concept relations;
O semicolon, praise we all, the best of all notations!
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Note: This poem appeared in the September 23, 2009 edition of the Grammar Girl newsletter, in celebration of National Punctuation Day, 2009. Any of you modernists who says that the use of semicolons is an affectation of overstylized writing had better goddamn well not say it in front of me.
Note #2: It's funnier if you read it out loud.
Note #3: Better yet, let me read it out loud to you. We can both laugh.
Note #4: If you liked this poem, you'll LOVE my book, "Verbosity's Vengeance: A Grammarian Adventure Novel". It's where word nerds and world domination meet!
Help keep the words flowing.
I LOVE this poem! So funny; yet so relevant. You did the dejected, underestimated semicolon justice. What do people have against the little guy anyway? He didn't do anything to anyone. I look forward to reading more of your work!
ReplyDeleteThanks! I can't promise it will all be funny, but keep checking back because you never know when the gems droppeth.
ReplyDeleteI think people lost respect for the semicolon when smilies came into vogue. Maybe it's just hard to take a punctuation mark seriously if you think it's making your sentences wink.
;-)
Ha! Well that reply was funny which means so far you have a good track record. I think you may be on to something!
ReplyDeleteI, too, am quite find of semicolons; they're little commas with cherries on top. And who wouldn't like that, I ask you????? So glad you entered Grammar Girl's contest. Well done.
ReplyDeleteLoved it! Favorite lines:
ReplyDeleteRelated concepts bloom within, so quickly they do roll on,
To show they're separate (but connected), apply the semicolon.
Made my day. Thanks! N. Beckus
Brilliant poem. A thoroughly enjoyable blog too, well done.
ReplyDeleteHeather, N. Beckus and Marc - I'm glad you liked the poem and the blog. A new piece of fiction goes up tomorrow morning. Feel free to stop back.
ReplyDeleteI learned about the semi-colon in High School; senior year, actually. In the lower grades it was never really discussed. So while I knew it existed, I didn't really know how to use it.
ReplyDeleteSo we had the instruction on it and I thought it was awesome. The lecture happened just before we turned in our final papers and my new found enjoyment of the semi-colon was evident by the teachers cooment at the top, "Did you really need 19 semi-colons?"
Yes. yes I did.
Great poem! I love it!
ReplyDeleteOh, I LOVE this poem! Thanks for posting it!
ReplyDeleteD. Paul, Elaine, Ganymeder: Belated thanks for reading, and for your great comments. Feel the love and spread the love; semicolonists unite!
ReplyDeletegrin...
ReplyDeleteThe semicolon is my favorite punctuation mark, and this is a lovely tribute. :-)
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ReplyDeleteBrilliant; I love it!
ReplyDeleteAh, a kindred spirit. I lurve semicolons.
ReplyDeleteI've been writing fanfic (ok, you can hiss or boo now if you feel inclined) and my beta (read: editor) for the first stories I wrote said I overused them, so I wrote this story:
http://tec4.co.cc/CSAotS.html
just for her. Some of the references will go over your head if you've never seen Combat! but I still think it's funny.
The semicolon is my favorite punctuation mark. The fact that I *have* a favorite punctuation mark is my geek cred.
ReplyDeleteI love semi-colons. I think you know this.
ReplyDeleteBRAVO! I've often felt that I've been eyed suspiciously for using and suggesting the use of semicolons. You make semicolons hip again! Love it. And BTW, my daughter's English/Language Arts teacher would love to use this in her classroom. Please advise? Thanks :) ... er... ;) I guess, lol.
ReplyDeleteWonderful! I love the semicolon. When I heard someone say don't use them, I formed a rebellion. I will use the semicolon! I will!
ReplyDeleteSemicolons are beautiful :)
Love the poem. Passing it along.
I really liked this poem, it explains the use of semicolons perfectly!
ReplyDeletejoeschmitt: Everybody should love semicolons!
ReplyDeleteApple: You make semicolons hip again! Thanks!
Angela: Oh, sure, the language would get by without semicolons, in the same way that carpenters would get by without framing hammers and just use a general-purpose claw hammer for everything. But, if you want to do the job right, you use the right tool for the job.
Helen: I'm glad you liked it!
We covered semicolons in Language Arts class today, so we read this at the end as a treat!
ReplyDelete