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#FridayFlash: Lebensturm

Lebensturm

by Tony Noland

Outside the tower
winds whip cold then hot, the gray-green sky promising the end of the world, the first fat drops thudding into the dust.

Within the tower
screens cry no.no.no. then YES!YES!YES!, the yellow-pink fist clenched over the launch button, the first real hopes blooming in what's left of his soul.

Beside the tower
flames cough then blast, the cobalt-crimson rocket rising fast, the first of ten thousand feet of copper-niobium wire trailing out of the carefully wound coil.

Above the tower
lightning licks then strikes, the purple-white power of the earthskysea delivered and conducted, the first of forty million electron volts flashing downward.

Beneath the tower
hydrocarbon cryoslush recoils then contracts, the ultraviolet-gamma light of nanochemistry orchestrated and focused, the first pulse of life in a new, new heart.

Beyond the tower
humanity sleeps then wakes, the blood-red/dead-black newlife shaped and moving abroad, the first shrieks of the last days of the first race of creators.

===== Feel free to comment on this or any other post.
Please note: I'm on vacation until mid-August, and will be able to respond to comments then.

16 comments:

  1. Good stuff, like the shifting perspective thing which was very poetic. Also i'm a sucker for end of the world writing. The last line is particularly fantastic.

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  2. Very cool story! I enjoyed the structure, and I found it enhanced the story quite well, tying everything together. The blinking bit of text was also quite neat.

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  3. The poetic feel to this gives the last line even more of a jolt.

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  4. Cool form, almost prose poem. Good and dystopian, just the way I like my reads. Peace...

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  5. One of my favorites of yours, Tony. This is excellent. Love everything about it.

    You really packed a novel into these few verses. Well done.

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  6. Tony. Very cool special effects and sublime piece.

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  7. Wonderful orchestration and synergy in this piece.
    Adam B @revhappiness

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  8. Very very very cool piece. It has a rhythm with the towers and a great sense of foreboding which you let fly in the last line. Loved it!

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  9. You seem very tired, Tony. Also very amused by special effects. I hope you get plenty of rest and effects wherever you've gone on vacation. Looking forward to what you cook up while you're away.

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  10. I so dug the shifting perspectives. Nice experiment.

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  11. It felt like a movie showing scenes happening simultaneously. Very interesting.

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  12. yes, the structure worked very well for this piece. And that last line...

    Excellent.

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  13. At first I was thrown by the structure, but I quickly settled into a comfort zone.

    Ah, be careful what you wish for, for you may just get it -- the new 'Frankenstein' is unleashed. Asks that age old question, just because we can, should we?
    ~jon

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  14. Thanks for all the comments, guys. Obviously, I went quite far off the beaten path with this one. I'll be back to my usual prose structure next week.

    8-)

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  15. Brilliant, and nice structure. Glad you tweeted about that lightning rod!

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  16. I like the layout and pace of this piece and it sort of sets the story too. Great piece

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