Alcoholism and writing

Was going to copy a bunch of website text, replacing "drinking" with "writing" for a funny blog post. Then I thought about fair use.

So I made up my own text.

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Answer each of the following as: "Very Often", "Very Frequently", "Very Occasionally", or "Never":

"Is writing interfering with your job?"

"Do your friends and family know how much you write?"

"Do you hide your writing from your spouse?"

"Do you write in the morning?"

"Have you ever chosen writing by yourself over a family obligation where you knew there would be no writing?"

"Are there people in your life who encourage you to write more than you should?"

"Did you start writing at an early age?"

"Were your parents or other family members heavy writers?"

"Do you write to 'cope' with life?"

"On average, how many pages do you write a week?"

"Have you ever 'lost time' writing?"

"Have you ever spent so much time writing that your performance was impaired the next day (i.e. 'binge' writing)?"

"Has anyone ever taken advantage of you sexually while you were writing?"

"Have you ever sustained an injury because of your writing?"

"Has your writing caused you to lose contact with friends?"

"Has anyone (spouse, family member, clergy, etc.) ever confronted you about your writing?"

"Have you ever written at inappropriate times?"

"At the local coffee shop, library, etc., is there a table that you consider 'yours' because you spend so much time there?"

"Have you ever bought major items (furniture, equipment, etc.) that would allow you to write even more?"

"Have you ever written anything that tasted bad or that you knew wasn't good for you, simply because there wasn't anything else to write?"

"Imagine a perfect day. Does it include writing? Now imagine what that day would be like without writing. How do you feel?"

"Have you ever made plans to do something, but ended up writing instead?"

"Do you plan your weekends and vacations around writing? Or do you make sure that you can write while on vacation?"

"Do you feel that your writing makes you more interesting?"

"Do you restrict your dating only to people who also write?"

"Does life seem more 'livable' when you are writing, or when you are with others who are writing?"

"Is there a special place in your house that you go in order to write undisturbed? Do you 'sneak' write?"

"Has your health suffered because of your writing?"

"Does your writing prompt you to eat unhealthy foods to excess?"

"Have you ever felt stress because you weren't able to write?"

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Scoring: Give yourself 5 points for every 'Very Often', 3 points for every 'Very Frequently' and 1 point for every 'Very Occasionally'.

0-6 points. You are not a writer, and didn't think this was funny.

7-20 points. You are a social writer.

20-40 points. You are a serious writer.

>40 points, or if you cringed reflexively at the repeated use of the word 'Very' in 'Very Often', 'Very Frequently' and 'Very Occasionally', you are a compulsive writer and should seek help immediately."

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