Halfway to ninety

Since today is my birthday, I spent a little time in the last few days doing what I typically do around birthdays: thinking about where I came from, where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going.

I turn 45 today, which means I'm at the point where I stop checking the "30 - 44" box on demographics forms, and start checking the "45 - 60" box. My considerations necessarily turn on the fact that I'm starting to sneak up on the midpoint of my life. (At least I hope I'm sneaking up on it, and haven't passed the halfway mark years ago.)

The conclusion of my ruminations? It's been a complicated road so far, with setbacks and false starts, but overall, I'm a lucky guy with much to be thankful for.

• My family and friends love and cherish me, and will show me that love and respect when I don't ask for it, and sometimes even when I've fallen short of being an ideal person.
• Most of my colleagues and coworkers like me and respect me. The few that don't? They value my work enough that they choose not to mention not liking and not respecting me. Can't ask for more than that.
• I'm not hungry, I'm not ill or infirm, I'm not crippled by debt, and I'm not without options and opportunities for the future.
• I add value to the world with my work and my volunteer efforts. Sometimes a lot, sometimes only a little, but I'm on the positive side of the ledger.
• My writing is pretty good. Granted, it sells about as well as a half-cup of cold coffee, but market success isn't the be-all and end-all of valuation. Maybe someday my writing will add some value to the world, too. Stranger things have happened.

If this is the midpoint, then at the end of my life, I'll be an old codger, looking back from 2059 on the past 90 years, wondering how I could have been so green and immature back when I was 45. Regardless, I'm happy with the life I lead, and with my place in it. Happy birthday to me.


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